Do you want to be right or happy?

“Every couple in their daily life together messes up communication, and every marriage has a dark side. It seems that what may matter the most is the ability to repair things when they do go wrong” – John Gottman.

By “repair”, Gottman is talking about the ability of both or either of the partners to do or say something that either breaks the tension or leads to a resolution of the negative emotion that the issue has created. Only when negative emotions have been dispelled will a couple have the opportunity to resolve the issue itself.

And Dr. Wayne Dyer would often say that one of the things that helped him the most was having the thought “do I want to be right or do I want to be kind?”

That’s not to say that we ignore bad behaviour or condone something serious that our partner has done that we need to address but it does mean that in the course of daily life it is always better to pick being kind. It is even more important to pick being happy as opposed to being right.

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David Fox is an author, speaker and registered psychologist with a masters degree in psychology. He believes that overcoming issues like anxiety and depression are best tackled on multiple fronts such as exercise, supplements, working with your thoughts and beliefs, watching your diet and talking to someone who can provide empathy and support while you figure things out. His goal is teach people individually and within organisations in how to help themselves thrive. In addition, David supports patients who would like to eventually reduce or potentially stop taking anti-depressant medication if they are finding major negative side effects from remaining on the medications and looking for alternative routes to a better quality of life. This is not for everyone, and yes some people may need to remain on some amount of medication – especially those with bi-polar disorder or schizophrenia. However, for those whose issues began as anxiety and/or depression, there may certainly be another way to healing other than medication. David is the author of the book Change your Life! Hope and Healing for Anxiety and Depression.

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